Dear Stepson’s Wife,
I am a tad bit irritated with you. Whether you like me or not really does not matter. What does matter is your rudeness. How difficult is it to simply say, “Thank you”? I mean, seriously.
I have been trying for the past four years where you and your husband are concerned. I make sure my husband, your father-in-law, knows when all of the birthdays are. I am the one who orders the gifts or sends the random things out. Do I actually want the credit? Hell no! I do it for my husband. I do it because I know he does not think about the little things.
What do I want? Why am I so freaking bothered and irritated at the moment? It is simply due to the fact you feel I do not even rate a ‘thank you’ when I wished you “happy birthday” yesterday. I noticed you had time to thank every other fucking person on the damn planet.
I realize I am only the stepmother-in-law. I am merely a name on a card to you. I am not worthy of your time. I do not travel to visit all of you. The last time we saw each other, you barely had any interactions with me. At the time, I was still in school so my focus was studying. I did make an effort to come out and spend a little time with all of you.
While we are at it, would it kill you to send some pictures to your father-in-law? I try to avoid Facebook, Instagram and most all other forms of social media. I do not want to have to stalk your damn pages to find pictures for my husband. I know good and damn well you have prints made. Just because he does not live near you does not mean he should be forgotten.
Whatever. I am done. Be glad we do not live near each other. With how I am currently feeling, I would make you cry. I would do anything and everything within my power to make you feel like a shitty, lowlife, unworthy person . . . The same way you make me feel anytime we have had some form of interaction.
If you do not like me, just be woman enough to let me know. It is as simple as that.
The Other Mother-in-Law
Oh how I wanted to actually say that! Her birthday was on Friday the 13th. In addition to sending a text bright and early (for me), I also made sure a birthday card with a gift card was sent. Not a single word was said UNTIL her husband, my stepson, said something to her. He did not know she had not acknowledged either the text or the card until my husband asked why she had not even bothered to say a simple “thank you”. This is what we (as she sent the text to both the husband and I):
Sorry to get back to you so late. Thank you for the card and gift card!! You really didn’t have to do that.
That was sent on Saturday, 28 January 2017. Fifteen full days later. I get she turned 30 and probably had a shit-ton of stuff happening. Being downright rude is inexcusable.
I did not reply. The husband did. He told her:
Honestly, that was Patti’s doing. But you’re welcome.
I really am over it. I will send cards and gifts to everyone except her. Even though the stepson and stepdaughter really do not like me, they at least are cordial and do say thank you. All three of us make an effort with each other.
Whether she likes it or not, I am a part of her husband’s life. Her parents are divorced. The father lives in Florida. The mother lives near them. They make a trip to see her father every. single. year. Do you think they could be bothered to do the same for the stepson’s? Granted, we are not rich. We cannot afford to fly a family of four (soon to be five) from their place to ours. It is only a seven hour drive. Eight if they do not go near Chicago. We would be more than willing to help them out with gas money. No hotel would be required as we have two available bedrooms and bathrooms.
My husband does not say too much with regard to this. I know it bothers him that it is up to him to go to visit them. Financially, we cannot afford to take vacations to see all five children (in four different states). ANY time my husband takes time off, we lose money. Thankfully, he is able to see them when his company has shipments to that area. Otherwise, he would not be able to see them very often and his grandsons would not be able to get to know him.
I am done. I have forgiven her (for myself not for her). I have learned my lesson. She is correct, we did not have to do that. Going forward, I am no longer going to worry about what to get her for Christmas or sending things for birthdays. Maybe one year in the future I will resume doing for her; however, as of 2017 it has stopped.
Life is all about what one makes it. I plan to make mine full of positivity.