Days 56 and 57 – The Ruts Have Appeared

These past several days have been real struggles for me.  I don’t know what the hell is going on, either.

On Sunday (Day 56), I did absolutely nothing.  I barely had 3000, I was that much of a slug.  Today (Day 57), I did Supercharged Sculpting and walked 2.75 miles with the puppies.  They were happy.  If they are happy, I am happy.

The food, on the other hand, has not been the greatest.  It’s almost like when the husband comes home, everything turns to shit.  It’s not like I stick to an eating schedule, but I do eat at least three to four times each day.  When he’s home, that goes by the wayside.  He eats like once or twice a day . . . mostly once per day.  I have told him I don’t know how many damn times I cannot eat like that.  He tells me to go ahead and eat and not to worry about him.  To me, I feel completely rude when I do.  However, my blood sugar gets all out of whack when I only eat once or twice per day.

We have worked too friggin’ hard to get to a good place in our marriage.  I do not want to revert back to him doing his thing and me doing mine but neither of us are doing the US-thing.  He is only home for MAYBE 36 HOURS each week.  I do NOT want to argue or have disagreements.  I want us to have QUALITY time together.

So, it looks like I’m going to have to figure out a different plan of attack for my food on the weekends.  I make sure I allow for us to go out at least once on the weekend.  Neither of us really feel like cooking since it’s just the two of us.  He will prep his food for the week either Saturday night or Sunday (depending on the time he has to leave on Sunday).

A typical Saturday is this:  he will get up and putz around the house for an hour or so until I wake up.  After I’m awake, he will take off and run his errands.  I will make my breakfast shake and take my meds.  If the weather permits, I take the puppies for a walk.  When he gets home, we spend the next four or five hours trying to figure out what we want to eat.  If I throw out suggestions, he is never interested.  He claims he can eat anywhere, but he will usually suggest fast food places.  I tell him I do NOT want fast food.  He HATES to ‘dress up’.  To him, dressing up consists of a decent pair of blue jeans and a nice polo shirt.  He definitely has the mindset of a  truck driver!

Anyway . . . I ate twice yesterday.  By the time I ate the second time, I was starving.  Poor food choices.  I make poor food choices when I am super hungry.  I opted for fast food.  Definitely NOT a wise decision on my part.  Today, I did MUCH better.  I did fast food again, but the difference is that it was fast food from the fridge.  I made a container of Minute Rice and a Deli Sliced Rotisserie Chicken on whole wheat bread with a slice of Pepper Jack cheese and yellow mustard.  Had the same thing for dinner and threw in some sauteed frozen corn.  Tomorrow I will try to go to the store so I can stock up on better options.

And to top it all off, this fickle weather is wreaking havoc with my sinuses.  It feels as though my body is fighting coming down with something.  This evening, I am dosing up on Benadryl.  Maybe getting at least seven hours of sleep will help.

Tomorrow is my momma’s 70th Birthday.  She’s going to lunch with her best friend of 60 years.  On Thursday, my brother and I will take her to either breakfast or lunch.  Work is hectic this week so I am limited on when I can go.  I don’t know what my three sisters are going to do for her.  It’s not like she needs or wants things.  If she wants or needs something, either she will get it or one of the five of us kids will.  So, for Christmas and Birthdays, there really isn’t much else to do for her.  🙂

Oh well . . . Tomorrow WILL be better!  I have come too damn far to blow everything now!  Even if I lose nothing this week, I am still better than I was last week . . .